Have You Heard the One About the Man Who Called Police On a Cat That Ate His Bacon?

“Me girlfriend let me cat eat me bacon.”

If a more perfect sentence has ever been uttered that affords equal attention to both bacon and cats—two of the internet’s obvious favorite subjects—I have yet to discover it. The above declaration is taken from audio capture of a telephone call placed by a gentleman in West Yorkshire, UK, who dialed 999 (the police/emergency services number) to report that a felonious feline had jacked the man’s bacon. Hoping to press charges against his girlfriend as well as the cat, the man phoned to report what would turn out to be no crime at all for two simple reasons that, to his credit, the caller seemed to accept without further incident:

  1. There’s no inherent criminality in allowing cats to enjoy bacon.
  2. The police do not arrest cats.

Listen to the audio at the Daily Mirror.

Image credit: The Daily Mirror

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